VIRTUALLY SPEAKING

A lot of people go through their lives reading, never searching for the meaning behind the written words, without realizing that the words are merely rocks set there for us to cross the river, and the reason the rock is set there, is so that we could cross to the other shore…the other shore is what matters.

José Saramago

Pop culture gives us the illusion of two separated worlds with different cultures. The first one is ‘’high quality culture’’, made of popular trends amongst self proclaimed intellectuals and artists. The other one is shallow mainstream pop culture. Both are opened to everyone, and they coexist, keep each other alive. Without the day, there would be no night; it is the same sky above us, after all. And the system works perfectly.

We would understand much more about life’s complexities if we applied ourselves to an assiduous study of its contradictions, instead of wasting time on identities and coherences, seeing as these have a duty to provide their own explanations.

― José Saramago, The Cave

The high quality pop culture form of the intellectual and artistic elitism and it is open 24/7 to everyone. To be part of it you don’t have to understand it. This culture offers an ideal world to the, let's call them, idea seekers. The ideas have been sold to young people since forever, and they are revolving around personal style and self marketing. And they have never been more transparent and available as today, because they can sell a complete lifestyle revolving around what is acceptable and what is not. And lifestyle means status.

All stories are like those about the creation of the universe, no one was there, no one witnessed anything, yet everyone knows what happened.

― José Saramago, Blindness

These idea seekers are people who are desperately trying to fill their inner void and boredom with these acceptable rules of the ''high pop culture''. For example, every idea seeker would list Frida Kahlo, Tom Waits, Jim Jarmuch, Kubrick, David Bowie, Bukowski as part of their own identity inspiration. Bukowski would probably send them to hell, while Frida might be disgusted that her red lipstick, brows and cigarette have become more famous than her passionate work. The heroes of the idea seekers are everything these people are not. They sell their heroes for social approval and devalue them in that way. The idea seekers are great internet consumers; they feed on every newsfeed searching for the new ideas all the time, without ever digging deeper into the core of it. Their satisfaction is shallow, and it is their ticket to the entrance of the illusionary intellectual and artistic elite circle, without saying or doing anything interesting for real.

The minds of human beings are not always entirely at one with the world in which they live, some people have trouble adjusting to reality, basically they're just weak, confused spirits who use words, sometimes very skillfully, to justify their cowardice.

― José Saramago

How to differ these idea seekers from the real thing diggers? The real thing diggers are loyal to their tastes and people, and are not concerned with actual trends, while always upgrading their knowledge and curiosity with something new. The real thing diggers seek for the inner sentiment and are not concerned with the need to prove themselves to others. They will share their interests as long as they feel connected with others that way, not to patronize others.  They are not concerned with putting stuff in boxes and tagging names on it. They don’t have to make propaganda of their inner world, because they really have one. They want to create. They also seek the ideas, but to dig deeper, to get to the others, not to feed their ego. And they are not afraid of the emotions they might find there. They are consistent because they know they've existed in the same way, long before virtually recreating themselves.

You know the name you were given, you do not know the name that you have.

― José Saramago

The modern universal man is virtual, satisfied, super confident, knows-it-all, has immense faith in himself and deserves the best of the best. The popular culture is inviting everyone to put on their crowns on. It is the idea of kingdom, not the real one of course. The art, music, literature, these things are real and will never disappear. The idea seekers are aware of that, but what they really don’t know is what to do with these ideas that can actually serve humanity and change everyday people's lives. The inner frustration and natural sadness are not being tolerated anymore. You have to act worthy enough to put on the crown.

Just as the habit does not make the monk, the sceptre does not make the king.

― José Saramago, Blindness

Literature above all, helps people to open their eyes, to think differently, so that these people could change the world around them. Saramago also thought that the only ones who could change the world were the pessimists (he considered himself to be one), because the optimist would always approved everything as lovely and nice and so nothing would have changed. The most important word in every language for him was the word ‘’no’’, and he believed one must repeat it numerous times during the day, in the context of ‘’I don’t want to do that’’, considering that was the way the man must keep his spirit awake and fulfill his citizen duty.

The outsiders, sentimental warriors, undocumented hearts and minds, quiet meaning seekers, fools for simple life, love and truth and all the other freaks, we salute you. To seek the life above ideas, photographs and words. This is not your culture anymore, this world of black and white, good and bad, worthy and unworthy. The grey works only for those who are playing by the rules of the game. The game itself is to be tolerated in everything except in tolerating others; to preach and to be heard, without offering anything positive to another human being. To sell music, art and literature and not to live them.

Perhaps only in a world of the blind will things be what they truly are.

― José Saramago, Blindness

A.B.

Love, Invitation to Inspiration

CIRCLES

When the sun shines, it burns your skin

When the wind blows, it shakes your feet

When the rain falls, the roof you seek

When the snow falls, you ask for heat

Too much of everything, or never enough

The weather is humble as much as you are

The nature takes care of everyone

The leaves fall from trees as they're all one

The ground gives after it feeds

The sky reflects the atoms of sea

The sea likes sun, sun makes you see

The circles are a promise

What you give, you recieve.

A.B.

photo via #reptarz

Invitation to Inspiration

SO EASY

I looked for the eyes in all funny places

Dark alleys, sunny spots, following traces

Skipped fresh years playing the fool

But I couldn’t fool my own truth.

Played those songs, fell for words

Ended up drained, wasn’t the first.

If I stop knocking will there be an empty hall

If I start shining will they turn heads to the wall

Is this how life is, they love to touch you when you fall

Climbing is for lonely ones, in the middle no one calls.

Don’t have to try no more, compete or prove them wrong

Read between the lines in any of their songs

He knew I would make it and was never really gone

I've almost let them take me, he was right here all along.

A.B.

Art print by Los Tomatos, ''The boy who stole the moon''

DRESS: OFF DRESS CODE: ON

There are never enough dresses in a girl's closet. After all, we all want to feel like queens when it comes to certain moments. And we just can’t get enough of those maxi dresses. Is it even possible to look glamorous without the dress? Is the dress all there is? We hope not. Here are some of our stylish inspirations for any kind of gala event you might be up to: 

1. LADY TUX

When you're sure there will be too many dresses, pick a female tuxedo. We are in the 21^st century and it is no longer shocking to see a woman wearing a tux and looking gorgeous. Angelina Jolie has proven it long time ago and Charlize Theron has just recently shown us how women can profit more with the tuxedo than a sparkling dress. 

Angelina Jolie, 2014.

Charlize Theron, 2016.

 

2. JUMPSUIT

Jumpsuits can be more than a casual outfit, but you already knew that, didn't you? Long or short, straight cut or skinny style, just search for the model which will make you feel both sexy and comfortable. That's what jumpsuits are all about, after all. 

Victoria Beckham, 2016.

Ashley Madekwe, 2013.

3. TOP & SKIRT

Knee length or below knee pencil skirt doesn't go out of style. With a crop shirt or chic top, you can beat the dress elegance with a more interesting look. Even a simple long dress and a Tee can look majestic. Don't believe it? Ask Amber Heard. It’s all about balancing the right pieces. 

Amber Heard, 2016.

Willa Holland, 2015.

               

4. TOP & HIGH WAIST PANTS

If you don't want to go with the skirt, there are many variations of high waist pants which can make you stand out in such elegant way. With the right pair of high heel shoes, palazzo pants, tapered pants or straight cut looks great with some chic top, and there you go.

Emma Stone, 2015.

Sarah Hyland, 2016.

  

5. TUNIC / KAFTAN

Yes, the tunic is a still more casual version of a party look. ''Kaftan'' refers to Eastern fashion and tradition of clothing, which has always been an inspiration for never ending boho trends. But do not underestimate the power of a lovely tunic. Kaftan is the synonim of the exotic glamour. It's never too late to meet your inner boho queen.

Kate Moss, 2011.

A.B.

Tell us what you think xoxo

Love, Invitation to Inspiration

MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO

Did you buy the same jacket? Cool, it's all fashion anyway. You do your ponytail like that, too? Oh, now we even have the same hair color…Aaaand you just used all my phrases among the group of people as yours. Welcome to the attack of clones. 

Familiar? Well, most girls are into same stuff, since we all fall for the, more or less, same commercial trends. Girlfriends inspire each other - I like your shoes, they would look great with the dress I've bought! - You go buy them, girl! - But clone attacking is more like an interior monkey monologue - Look at her…What else can I take from her to become better…Oh, I’ll take that thing she does with her makeup as my own. -

Who are these people and why do they want to copy other people to the smallest details? Why do we feel rage when noticing these patterns?

Because  we feel observed from the shadow, and then robbed. And before you even notice, there’s another you, with the same jacket, same shoes, same hairstyle. Flattered? Or paranoid maybe? Neither. Plus, your friends thought it was you on those photos. How awkward is that?.

How to defend yourself from the monkeys? Learn this:

1. Their target doesn't have to be anyone special. It could be their new colleague, a new friend, someone who has just entered into their private circle. This person triggers them into changing their own ways. They are easily influenced by anyone and anything, for example, their boyfriends, their ex-boyfriends, their friends, popular trends, their momentary environment.

2. They are not unaware of what they do. They consciously pick up your little habits and ways, and they use what they consider being most interesting and useful for them. They invest their energy into it and drain yours. Of course, we all get influenced by people we are close to and vice versa, but you’ll notice the difference between influencing and imitating. Influencing someone makes you feel valued, while the imitation can make you feel confused, even threatened or irritated. 

3. They speak only of what they’ve heard, using someone's words, phrases, etc.  They have zero inborn originality, so they must steal from the others these unique traits to appear interesting and sympathetic. Opinions, style, taste, manners, etc. That way they can easily go from one extreme to another, completely changing their persona from time to time, in order to adapt themselves to their momentary environment and situation. Notice the difference between healthy change and chameleon change - healthy change is part of the human growth, while chameleon change has nothing to do with the growth and personal development.

4. They may often appear confident, and they try very hard to make this impression on others, but they aren’t confident at all. They appear to have a high opinion of themselves, yet they steal the best of the best from everyone they find appealing and sell these traits as their own.  They are very concerned with being accepted and approved everywhere, by everyone. They crave so hard for the originality and tastefulness that they don’t have, so everything they pick up is more of a caricature of the real thing. Deep down they know this, so they might hate you for being you while hiding their shameful jealousy.

5.  You’re not crazy for feeling bad or for noticing you’re the monkey target. Others may not notice it since it is not about them. Most of the time, when we feel something’s there, it usually is. Nobody knows you and understands you better than you.

The best thing to do in these situations is to stay consistent & distant yourself. Recognize, ignore, and move away. Try not to observe the monkey. Do not jump into conclusions uncarefully and share them with everyone. It is simply not wise and the chances of being misinterpreted as snobbish are high. Leave others to their own conclusions. Monkeys usually get recognized, sooner or later.

Remember that a copy can never last like the original, as it cannot survive without its source. Even long lasting friendships or relationships with the monkeys are almost impossible if you seek the truth and sincerity in it. On the other side, monkeys would do anything to escape the solitude, cause without others, they simply do not exist. And that's all there is.

A.B.

Love, ITI

CAPS LOCK SONG

THE SPELL IS BLOCKED

THE BOOK IS UNLOCKED

YOU'RE REVEALED

I AM HEALED

YOU MESSED WITH THE WRONG ONE

I HAVE FRIENDS IN MY HOMETOWN

YOU SENT THE WRONG TEAM

MY COURTYARD IS CLEAN

I HAVE NO TOLERATION

FOR CHEAP IMITATIONS

MY RELATIONS ARE REAL

YOU BETTER NOT BE SEEN

INTRUDORS GET SLAPPED

MY WEAPON IS PACKED

THIS IS NOT A WARNING

IT'S A FEAST,  AND I'M STARVING.

A.B.

Peace and love, ITI

FISH LOVE

#obstreperuos

When you search for love, do you search for emotional high, physical pleasure and inner satisfaction? Do you seek the one who will understand all your needs, who you are, and what you can be? He or she must be worthy at the same time of your companionship? And if not, you'll search for another ONE? Is it love? Or is it trade? Are you trying to buy (emotionally, physically or literally) someone to keep up at your demands? The product which will eventually expire like every other. But you are smart, you will think of a plan in advance so that you never ever feel the burden of what you've chosen to be your LOVE. So I'm going to ask you again, what IS love?

Love truly can be emotional high, pleasure, passion and inner satisfaction. I truly believe love must be the essence of everything we do. Romantic love is more and more becoming an issue in these modern times and we all agree that the fairy tales aren't real life. But still, so many lonely and unhappy people, divorces, disappointed lives. So let's redefine romantic love without losing the word ''love'', cause romance alone is nothing more than a vain pursuit for your own personal fairy tale.

#zsalto

Romantic love is when you decide your partner is irreplaceable. It's the courage to keep walking together no matter the highs and the lows. Romantic love is unshakable trust in you and your partners common destiny. It is respecting each other as individuals, encouraging each others individuality, listening, feeling each other hearts, giving care and being taking care of in the same time. Sometimes it hurts, because you carry not just your own, but also your partners burden. And for the same reason, sometimes it is like a fairy tale. It is like saying: ''I am here for you and your life because I know you are here for me and my life.''  And while being on the same path, you have decided to fight together, as friends, not as the enemies. They will throw stones at you from now and then, you will be shaken with life's serial, but you always know: you're in this together. ''Today I might not like you, and I might not like myself, but your hand is still in my hand. It's saying, ''I respect you for all of what you are, cause you are part of me, and I am part of you. Unconditionally, shamelessly.'' And  is one rare two-way street-romantic love. 

In fact, every love should be like that. In friendship, in family, as the human empathy. But somehow, somewhere, someone has changed all the rules making us sound infantile for believing in love. However, no words can mask the true meaning of things instinctively felt in our hearts. I guess today, living for love in general is a true act of rebellion.

#nastygal

Today's love: Fish love

This is how Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski speaks of love. He goes to the core of the matter. You can listen and watch the entire speech here.

''Love is a word that in our culture has almost lost its meaning now. Very interesting story about the Rabbi who came across a young man who was clearly enjoying the dish of fish that he was eating, and he said to the young  man, ''Why are you eating the fish? - Because I love fish.'' He said, ''Oh you love fish, that's why you took it out of the water and killed it.'' He said, ''Don't tell me you love the fish, you love yourself. And because the fish tastes good to you, therefore you took it out of the water, and killed it, and boiled it. '' 

...

So much of what is love is fish love. And so, young couple falls in love, young man and young woman fall in love, what does that mean? That means that he saw in this woman someone who he felt could provide him with all his physical emotional needs, and she thought in this man somebody she feels that she can write ''that was love'', but each one was looking out for their own needs. It's not love for the other, the other person becomes a vehicle for my gratification. Too much of what is called love is fish love. Love is not what I'm gonna get but what I'm gonna give . We had an ethicist rabbi Deshler who said that people make serious mistake in thinking that you give to those whom you love. And the real answer is you love those to whom you give.  And his point is , if I give something to you, I've invested myself in you. And since self-love is given, everybody loves themselves, now that part of me has become in you, there's part of me in you that I love. So true love is a love of giving, not a love of receiving.

#neverstayin

''Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.''

- Oscar Wilde

 A.B.

Love, ITI